A list of Target Do's and Don'ts

Do - Take your clothes off the hangers when you buy a whole new wardrobe!

Don't - Hand me each item one at a time refusing to lay them on the belt. If they get dirty, WASH BEFORE YOU WEAR!

Do - Take your cart, or basket back to the front of the store.

Don't - Leave the basket or cart in the middle of the check lanes like it goes there, cause if you do it, EVERYONE does it!

Do - Put your cart all the way back.

Don't - Take your cart back to the front of the store and just leave it in the vicinity of the other carts. For the love of god push it back in line. It's like 3 steps further. Once again, if you leave it near the carts, others leave them there too!

Do - Have as close to exact change ready, or have your check mostly written. Be ready to pay!

Don't - Make me wait for you to dig 89 cents out of the bottom of your purse when I can totally count back 11 cents faster. (I am being timed to check you out btw)

Do - Give me things you don't want to buy. It's ok really. so ...

Don't - Leave your 70 gallon jug of Tide in the middle of the damn main isle of the store, or stuff things into the candy boxes or pile stuff on the drink coolers, or leave it anywhere other than with a cashier or back where you got it!

Do - Take you cart back to a cart well in the parking lot. If you need to take them out, it's ok. Just...

Don't - Put your cart up on the grass medians or in other parking spaces or all the way at the other end of the parking lot. Once again, 3 steps further and everyone else won't leave them in the medians too!

Do - Be considerate when I'm guiding 70 carts out of the parking lot and back into the store with the Quickart.

Don't - Go through the cart door when you see me coming with my 70 carts, because the door clearly says NOT AN EXIT, DO NOT ENTER! And also If I have to stop the carts from running you over, it's very difficult because of something we call momentum, momentum I have to stop with my body so you don't get killed. So when I do this DON'T just keep going through the damn door. MOVE! Seriously next time I'm gonna just run you down.

Do - Try to use the self serve card machines to pay with your credit or debit card. It helps keep up my cashier speed. (see be ready to pay)

Don't - Make me explain to you how to use your own credit card when the machine already tells you every step to do. Also DO NOT tell me "All these things are different." I KNOW! GET OVER IT! IF YOU CAN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO USE IT, THEN YOU DON'T GET TO! AHHH.

Do - Tell me if you want orders separate or if something needs to be bagged by itself. but...

Don't - Tell me how to bag EVERYTHING! I am smart. And I can figure most of these things out myself.

Do - Help put the bags back into your cart if you have a lot of stuff.

Don't - Reach over the counter and take the bag off of the rack yourself! I HATE THIS. It's my rack, and my bag and until I give it to you leave it the hell alone! Also in the dont' reach over category

Don't - Reach over the counter and take your receipt off the printer. It's my receipt until I give it to you. Which I will. I haven't not given a receipt in the past 4 months, don't plan to anytime soon. And don't tell me not to put it in your bag. I didn't say I was going to. I always hand receipts to guests. And if I do put it in the bag. Just take it back out for the love of all that's holy. It's not like being in the bag makes it disappear!

Do - Let me see your credit card when I ask, and if it's not signed then let me see your ID, and ...

Don't - Throw a huge bitch fit about this process. It's to protect you from someone stealing your credit card. And if in the event you don't like to sign your cards. Don't get defensive and tell me "I'm not gonna sign my cards" I DIDN'T SAY YOU HAD TO! But it does say on the card invalid unless signed, and Void if the signing area is rubbed off. So technically I don't even have to take your unsigned card. SO THERE!

Ok, I really have to go to the eye doctor now, so that's all I'm gonna write now.

Out like a Scout,

~G

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